This afternoon on my way from work to the Varsity run group, I talked on the phone with a friend who was having a rough day and told me he needed a pep talk that included "Get your shit together" and "Move on," so I told him those things, but then I threw in some of my own lines. Using some catchphrases from the cool kids (mostly "live your best life"), I told him something along these lines:
You have to live your best life. It might not be the best life you thought you were going to have, but it could just be better.
I also gave him some other bits of advice that are more specific to his situation. After we hung up, I thought about some of the times when life did not deal me the hand I was expecting. I thought back to some feedback I received on a paper I turned in for my Access and Choice class about my college choice process. Among the feedback from my professor were these comments:
"I also appreciate your honesty in talking about schools that you didn’t get into...Sometimes people see successful, talented people as not ever experiencing rejection … and that is often far from the case."
Then tonight on Facebook, at least two of my friends made posts about some difficulties they are having in their lives, and I felt compelled to share some of my less glamorous moments. In the spirit of life balance, I am going to list some failures, rejections, and disappointments I have experienced in life. They are not all from the past month (in fact, many of them aren't) but I did manage to come up with 24 items, which matches my number from yesterday.
- I got rejected from my first choice college (Duke University) in 2006.
- I got rejected from every medical school I applied to in 2010.
- I was also rejected from serving as a Leadership Consultant for Alpha Gamma Delta in 2010.
- I was not accepted to facilitate at the Undergraduate Interfraternity Institute (UIFI) in 2018.
- I was initially not accepted to facilitate at UIFI in 2019, but I moved up the waitlist enough to be able to go.
- I got picked up by the sag bus at the Marine Corps Marathon in 2014.
- I fell off of a platform not once but twice the first time I went to Lunchtime Lifts last month.
- I DNFed (did not finish) the Possum's Revenge 69-mile race in May.
- I got rejected from NC State's Higher Education Administration Ph. D. program in 2018.
- I don't even know how many jobs I have been rejected from in my life...including jobs I thought I would for sure get.
- Also, I once got denied from the same job twice.
- I've also been rejected from jobs on my voicemail, which has pros and cons to being rejected live on the phone, but it was still unpleasant.
- Most of the people I dated dumped me rather than me dumping them.
- I've cooked some bad meals and desserts in my life.
- I got rejected from facilitating at Alpha Chi Omega's Leadership Academy last year.
- I got rejected from facilitating at Sigma Alpha Epsilon's Executives Academy this year.
- I got rejected from being a facilitator of Kappa Kappa Gamma's Harm Prevention Program last year.
- I failed my driver's test the first time I took it (2004).
- I had to take Organic Chemistry I and II twice each (which probably should have been an indicator that #2 was going to happen, but I pressed on)
- I lost a lot of spelling bees. I lost the 4th-grade spelling bee when I left a "k" out of "bookkeeper." I remember this because the person I lost to (who was my friend) told me that was an easy word for her because it's "b-oo-kk-ee-per." I also lost the 5th-grade spelling bee, but I don't remember the word I lost with. After winning the 6th-grade spelling bee, I lost the school spelling bee by missing "pursuit." I spelled it "persuit." I lost at the 6th-grade spelling bee at the district level with the word "allege." I spelled it "alledge." I lost the 7th-grade spelling bee with the word "brocade," and I have still never had a cause to use the word "brocade" other than mentioning that I lost a spelling bee with it. I lost the 8th-grade spelling bee too. I don't know what I missed that year.
- I was in FBLA in high school. To attend the National Leadership Conference in my event, I had to place in the top two at state. I placed 3rd in 2004 and 2005 before moving to 2nd in 2006 (at last)!
- I never made district honor band. In fact, I tanked almost every musical audition I ever had except when I auditioned for the wind ensemble at Mercer.
- The one semester I had to do a jury in college, I blew that.
- One time I made jambalaya for my hall using a Tony Chachere's kit and thought it'd be vegetarian if I just didn't add chicken or sausage. NOPE, THERE'S CHICKEN BOULLION IN THAT, AND I FED IT TO MY VEGETARIAN STUDENTS.
Anyway, the point of this is that while I have lots of amazing things going on in my life--the fact that I can list as many awesome moments from the past few weeks as I can name about ugly moments over many years is testament to that--sometimes I mess up, fall short, or just have less to offer than other people in the universe. That's okay. It happens to everyone. If I had more time to think about it, I could come up with even more items to list, but I also try not to dwell on these moments. I try to grow from them and think about how life is better in some ways I ever imagined it, and that feels pretty darn good.
|I ate this delicious donut today.|
Something that made today great: Great run with Sandra tonight!
Time I woke up: 8:23 am